I am Robin Zlotnick, a writer (of humor and short fiction and one novel-in-progress I may or may not talk about here, as I am currently writing a painful third draft) and a new mom (of a perfect baby boy who makes me laugh every single day and also makes me very tired every single day) and a consumer of pop culture (mostly comedy, horror, Vanderpump Rules, and weird movies my husband makes me watch), and this is my newsletter, which will be one sentence long — no more, no less — and will probably be weekly but maybe biweekly and will include something about one of the aforementioned parts of myself, or my thought (singular) about a current event, or a short, funny bit (no promises on the funny part), but like I said, each one will be literally one sentence long because none of us have any time (like, whatsoever) and I don’t want this to feel laborious for you or for me but I really want to communicate more with lovely people on the internet, so I hope this can be a bright moment and we can all be friends and talk about fun stuff, and I do not promise that every sentence will be grammatically correct, but I’ll try.